Grandpa, had you patented what you did in college, you would have become rich and you could have given us substantial presents for our birthdays!
When my grandchildren crowd round me in the night after dinner, they usually beg me to tell them about my young days and how I went to college and of my successes and failures.
Though my stock runs out, they are very eager to hear about on incidents again and again. Like a ‘stuck' gramophone record, I would tell them the same story night after night. After I finished the recounting the story, they would always exclaim, “Grandpa, had you patented what you did in the college, you would have become rich and you could have given us substantial presents for our birthdays, instead of the oral blessings now you are giving us.”
It becomes necessary for me to share with readers this tale which so fascinates my grandchildren. More than half a century ago, I came from our village to Madras to join college for my Pre-University Course. I suppose that is now an equivalent to the present 10 + 1.
As I was from the mofussil, I did not know that it was taboo to wear shorts (then called “half pant”) for college. I had only one pair of trousers (full pant) and many “half pants” and, out of necessity, I had to wear shorts. Within two days, I became famous in a negative way and acquired the tag “half pant.” I was called “the half pant,” even though I stopped wearing them after a week's time for fear of ridicule. Incidentally, none except schoolboys wore shorts in Madras those days. You could never see a young or middle-aged man or an elderly person wearing half pants,' unless he was a foreigner, who was exempt, I do not know why.
I also sported a luxurious pony tail, then called kudumi (tuft) and wore two kadukkans (earstuds). This gave the other students a lot of merriment and they also used to call me “girlie.” I wrote to my parents that I might be permitted to sport a cropped hair and also to remove the ear studs.
After considerable delay, and only after I threatened them that I would discontinue my studies did they relent and permit me to turn “modern.” In spite of all this, my tag as “half pant” did not disappear and all through my college career I was addressed only as half pant. A classmate always used to tease and taunt me and I had to bear it with a grin as he was double my size.
About five years ago, I came across that very same person, who is over 60 like me, and he was wearing shorts (which is a rage now among all people except children who seem to detest it) and I could not help laughing at the spectacle. I accosted him and asked him how come he wore half-pants now, having made fun of me in college. He slunk away with a shameful face, not only because he knew I had a point there, but also because I was double his size now!!
Now, I also find men sporting long hair like women (for a change, women now sport short hair). Men also wear ear studs, though only in one ear.
This is why my grandchildren say that I should have patented my style of wearing half pants and sporting kudumiand, of course, wearing the kadukkans. Alas, I did not think about it then and, now, I am the loser. My grandchildren say that they are the losers, as they have to be content only with my oral blessings on their birthdays.